Foolprints in the Sand

AN HOMAGE TO
"FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND"

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints.
Other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,
like when I contracted AIDS
and when my son's leg was mangled by a thresher,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,
"The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand, my child,
is when I walked behind you, in your footprints,
so that I would have a better angle to inject you with AIDS
and steer that thresher over your son.
Okay, and one time I had to take off for, like, five minutes,
to create a tsunami.
Oh, and Darfur, obviously.
So two times."

(This poem is dedicated to those smart enough to understand that atheists don't hate god or blame him/them for bad things. They hate the irrationality that leads theists to credit god for the inner strength humans have to endure awful ordeals, but never to fault god for allowing those ordeals to occur.)